Tears of Rejection

One of the hardest parts of being a writer is the rejection that comes with it, but they say you should embrace the no responses. After all, you can't hear yes without hearing no first.

Don't Reject Me

I’m a writer which makes rejection a part of my life, and I’m not exactly a millionaire writer which makes the rejection a large part of it.

Today I received a rejection email that was actually one of my favourites because it told me what I needed to fix before resubmitting to them. I thought it was great that it was so constructive, but at the end of the day it was still a rejection and so inevitably a sense of dejection followed, because it’s still another no to add to the pile. The pile that could compete with a mountain, while the yes pile isn’t even as thick as a carpet.

So, what’s the best way to handle rejection? Good question. If you find out, let me know.

A glass of wine: that’s for sure. Some chocolate: absolutely. But then what…? When I was younger it used to spur me on, it made me work harder, I was more determined. That was at the start though. Now the determination is harder to come by. Now the sense of defeat lasts longer. Now I find it more challenging to just dust myself off and get back to my computer.

I allow myself to feel sad about it for a night, and in that night I can cry, complain, sulk, sob, eat donuts, drink wine. The next day though, I force myself to get back to work and not think about it. Of course it’s not that easy. I can’t say, ‘oh well, it’s just one’ anymore, because my writing career has been long. The no responses have inevitably built up.

I know it’s true that in these careers where the work is subjective, it’s common for the rejections to outnumber the acceptances, but that’s cold comfort when you see the token email that basically says thanks but no.

I guess the true comfort in seeing ‘Unfortunately it’s not for us’ again is that at least I’m not alone. Writers, actors, illustrators, musicians…and many others…we all hear it over and over again.

No one ever said that being a writer was easy, and I’ve heard it said that if you can’t handle rejection then you have no business being a writer. That doesn’t mean I can’t wail about it though.

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